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Perspective

Sometimes it is so hard to see the blessings in our life because we get caught up in the problems and conflicts that surround us. We focus on the negative because well, it is easier and as humans we are drawn to what we find easiest to do and unfortunately when we do this, it just create more of the same.

I am a firm believer in self-fulfilling prophecies – the age-old adage that what you think about, you bring about. Growing up the way I did, with the problems that I had to face, I had to believe it because if I focused on what I had or where I had been, I would never be able to see where I could go and what I could be. It isn’t easy but it is simple.

So often I see clients who are so caught up in the things they don’t have, that they not only can’t see or appreciate what they do have, they actually become angry when you point it out to them. Why is that do you think? Could it be that people become comfortable surrounding themselves with negative energy? Perhaps it is such a habit that any thought of stopping it sends them into an addicts-panic? It is a sad state to be in and I know that we all know someone like that – someone who sees the glass as not only as half empty, but sees the spots on the glass as well. What is the solution?

Well my solution can be found in one word – PERSPECTIVE. That’s it. Everyone needs some perspective in their lives. And as simple as it is – it can be so hard to be willing to get some that this is often the point in counselling that I stop seeing clients for awhile because they suddenly become ‘busy’.  So what do I mean by perspective? Well…

– If you are worried about finances – you never have enough money, you complain constantly about how you are limited and can never do what you want to do…. visit a homeless shelter.

– A compulsive over-eater at risk of numerous diseases just ‘can’t’ do what it takes to stop because of…. well whatever the excuse of the day is – I may introduce them to an amputee that lost their legs to diabetes or a person who has lost their sight.

– A woman who complains of her husband and how unsupportive and awful he is to her by not cleaning up around the house – some time at a women’s shelter often makes things seem different at home.

I am not suggesting for a second that these issues are minute or insignificant at all, they are incredibly important to the people they afflict but they are NOT insurmountable as they often seem when all you do is focus upon them. Often when we are focused so fully on a problem, it is larger than life with no solution in sight – it seems so incredibly difficult we don’t even try to fix it, we just go around and around the mountain it becomes and lament the day it came to be and not realize that with every pass by, we enlarge it with our impotence. Often some perspective will allow us to see it for what it is or what it could become if we don’t conquer it and we find the strength and motivation to begin trying to fix it. We may not get it at first but the more we try, the more we are willing to try to solve whatever problem it is, the less it grows and smaller it becomes.

A problem is only a problem if you are willing to solve it. If you are unwilling then it is no longer a problem – it is a fact of life. It’s like the old prayer goes – change what you can, accept what you can’t and always seeks to know the difference.

This entry was posted on Friday, April 9th, 2010 at 2:52 pm and is filed under Mental Health, Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

5 Responses to “Perspective”

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  1. Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake. Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)

  2. This post is usefull.

  3. It’s hard to find knowledgeable bloggers on this topic, but you seem like you know what you’re talking about! Thanks.

  4. interesting post, pretty much covered it all for me, thanks.

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